Ouf..Start Again?

No matter where you go or what you do, you live your entire life within the confines of your head. ~Terry Josephson

I am supposed to be God’s greatest Creation.. A rational being, full of energy and knowledge, powered by wisdom and ‘rational thinking’. I am superior to all other species with my ability to analyse, infer,decide, feel, .. so on and on… Armed with the ultimate ‘sixth sense’, here I go to conquer the world ..

Sounds like some old Nazi movie????? Well, this perfectly reflects one of my favorite thoughts.. “Are we supposed to think? Do we need to get mature over time? Does thinking helps us in leading a successful(no no .. make it ‘happy’.. cos I cant define wat’s a success.. come to speak of it, I cant define happy too.. sounds crap right??) life or is it actually a barrier preventing us from doing so? Are we limited by our “sixth sense”?

Wat do u think? Should we think? Does it do good to us to think? Hmmm…

I think I was better off when I was a child.. I was considered “immature” in worldly terms.. Ya.. lil stupid…But,it was good.. who cared about right n wrong? Doing wat I wanted to do and not wat I supposed to do…

And then some wise ppl came… full of quotes, advices, moral Stories, philosophy, wisdom, , , …… I was educated about positive thinking, maturity, dreams, goals, aspirations, hard work, humanity, knowledge…crap.. And I fell for it… I thought “ Here is a new world.. I have a vision.. Let me have dreams n start working towards them.. It feels sooooooooo gud.. I ve to make myself lil more mature.. should go to the next level of thinking”..

Come to think of it now, I wonder why I wanted to be mature.. May be the word maturity sounded lil fascinating to me.. “Mature ppl are awesome…it’s cool to be mature…” Damn.. The whole world kidded to me and I was on my way to find maturity and wisdom..

One might argue that without maturity,I wud ve remained stupid n wud ve never realized life.. I ask, “so wat??”.. I wud ve been ignorant of something called maturity and so the lack of maturity wud nt ve affected me.. ignorance is a greatest bliss, according to me.. so, hw I can be sad of something which I am ignorant of?

Back to where I left, I focused all my thoughts on this ‘wisdom’ crap.. I thought I was going good…gaining wisdom rapidly, growing rapidly…ya.it was cool to be wise… after so much hardship, I was considerably wise(or thought I was) and mature and rational.. I started reasoning out everything n my life went gud.. and I was amazed by the way my mind can think….

Every1 have their dawn of realization, right? Well, I was not an exception.. you have heard this one? “The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.”.. Well, this was from Bernard shaw.. btw,when u find some time, read shaw’s works…

So, someday it occurred to me that I was not wrong abt anything… when I see from one perspective, it was right. When I see from other, it was wrong. From yet another one, I was clueless whether it was right or wrong.. So, damn, I was just changing my perpectives from time to time.. Maturity made me think “Live for others”.But, I can also say “Live for oneself”.. both are right.. so, I had endured all pain trying to achieve righteousness, when no such thing existed…

In the process of growing mature, my thoughts have grown from simple to complex to more complex.. in order to deal my life effectively, I go to next level of maturity ..ya..now my problems are gone.. but, at that level of maturity, the problems are create are more complex and so I go to next higher level to deal with them n so on.. I ve been trying to climb a ladder, just for the heck of climbing it.. I may, very well, not had climbed it at all…

So, the only thing I ve learnt in all these years is that there is no need to grow mature n wise.. But, in order to realize that, I ve grown mature n wise.. sounds stupid? All the beliefs I started believing in my path to maturity now look back @ me n mock…Now to think of it, I believe in all beliefs.. u say sumthin, I believe. But, I also believe the contracdictory..so, ultimately, u can take that I believe that there is no belief..or that I believe in all beliefs.. so,the hardship I underwent to from the beliefs in the first place is a waste of time…

So, wat next? I shud try not to reason out.. I should reason out not to reason out..but, that’s reasoning out..so, this becomes kind of vicious cycle..”Reason out Not to reason out”…”Think not to think”….hmmm…. damn..

Well, tht brings us to the quote @ the start of this blog.. We are all confined within our heads.. we try to break the confinements by increasing our wisdom n mature thinking..but, in the process we increase the confinements n so the wheel rotates…

If someday asks me “give me all ur knowledge n maturity n wisdom n I’ll give u ignorance, I’ll go 4 the exchange”.. cos this maturity has only shown me how ignorant I am…

If u think this blog is a piece of bull shit, well, I very much envy u … cos u are able to form a opinion, which I am nt able to..

Ps: I really think Neo should have taken the other pill…

But, well, then, we wud ve not gotten such fighting sequences,may be..

Ps:This being my first try on blogs, any comments, i really mean annnnyyyyyyy, are utmost welcome.....

Men fear thought as they fear nothing else on earth, more than ruin, more even than death. Thought is subversive and revolutionary, destructive and terrible, thought is merciless to privilege, established institutions, and comfortable habit. Thought looks into the pit of hell and is not afraid. ~Bertrand Russell